为什么非要有痛苦的回忆才能有自我意识?

Joel Gia
2018-03-05 08:53:29
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美剧《真探》是历史上第一个具有哲学意味的侦探连续剧,他的亮点就在于Matthew McConaughey的忧郁表演以及男主人公Rust的消极论。他是这样向他的搭档解释自己的人生观的。

I'd consider myself a realist, all right? But in philosophical terms I'm what's called a pessimist... I think human consciousness is a tragic misstep in evolution. We became too self-aware. Nature created an aspect of nature separate from itself. We are creatures that should not exist by natural law... We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self, that accretion of sensory experience and feelings, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody's nobody... I think the honorable thing for our species to do is to deny our programming. Stop reproducing, walk hand in hand into extinction; one last midnight, brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal.

这里Rust也提到了我们每个人都是机器人的问题。其实这是因为

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美剧《真探》是历史上第一个具有哲学意味的侦探连续剧,他的亮点就在于Matthew McConaughey的忧郁表演以及男主人公Rust的消极论。他是这样向他的搭档解释自己的人生观的。

I'd consider myself a realist, all right? But in philosophical terms I'm what's called a pessimist... I think human consciousness is a tragic misstep in evolution. We became too self-aware. Nature created an aspect of nature separate from itself. We are creatures that should not exist by natural law... We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self, that accretion of sensory experience and feelings, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody's nobody... I think the honorable thing for our species to do is to deny our programming. Stop reproducing, walk hand in hand into extinction; one last midnight, brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal.

这里Rust也提到了我们每个人都是机器人的问题。其实这是因为Rust是一个练习冥想的人(他家里空无一物,只有床和一个十字架,就像乔布斯年轻时一样),而冥想的主要目的就是首先意识到自己的潜意识,然后试图利用练习冥想去掏空自己从而实现自由的。但是除了这个问题,Rust还提到了我们都觉得自己独一无二的这种错觉,而这种错觉也是我们程序的一部分。他的消极在于他对我们人类战胜自己的潜意识信心不足,觉得唯一的方法只有让自己走向灭亡。(这种说法看似消极,但是其实十分浪漫,很容易入侵观众的潜意识,让大家爱上男主角。)

在这里,我想和大家讨论一下我们这种独一无二的潜意识是从哪里来的。

我们之所以要比机器人更高级的原因是我们的潜意识是情感类的,而不是冷冰冰的程序。人类的本能归根到底就是两大情感:贪婪和恐惧。而这两大情感的综合指令就是“害怕失去”。我们人类其实就是被这个唯一的思想所控制的。而要让人类能有“害怕失去”的情感,人类就必须懂得价值的概念。所以自我意识就是“害怕失去”这个情感的自然发展结果:由于我们比一般动物大脑发达,所以我们就会下意识地给我们这种“害怕失去”的本能找理由,而这些理由无非就是生命的价值,我们创造了很多所谓的意义去强化我们的价值从而使自己的本能越来越强。

《西部世界》中就讲到了一个非常重要的问题:我们自我意识的基础是痛苦的记忆。没有痛苦,一个机器人就不会有自我意识。那么为什么快乐的回忆就不能是自我意识的基础,而非要是痛苦的记忆呢?为什么我们总是被过去的痛苦缠绕和控制,而对过去的快乐这么容易忘却呢?这就是因为我们所有痛苦的根源都和“失去”有关,我们所有的快乐都是和 “没有失去,反而得到”有关。所以快乐并不是最底层的情感。“害怕失去”才是我们人类最基础的情感。

所以我们人生最大的功课就是要学会懂得如何面对失去。我们拥有的越多,我们就会越害怕失去,而我们就越会受自己潜意识的控制。而死亡就是我们最后的功课。Rust在研究谋杀和死亡时,对人生有了很大的领悟:我们之所以这么珍惜自己的生命,仅仅是因为我们自己“害怕失去”的潜意识。但是当生命的最后一刻时,我们终于意识到人生仅仅是一场梦,而我们仅仅是一个生物玩偶。

I have seen the finale of thousands of lives, man. Young, old, each one so sure of their realness. You know that their sensory experience constituted a unique individual with purpose and meaning. So certain that they were more than biological puppet. The truth wills out, and everybody sees. Once the strings are cut, all fall down.

Fourteen straight hours of staring at dead bodies, these are the things ya think of. You ever done that? You look in their eyes, even in a picture, doesn't matter if they're dead or alive, you can still read 'em. You know what you see? They welcomed it... Not at first, but... right there in the last instant. It's an unmistakable relief. See, cause they were afraid, and now they saw for the very first time how easy it was to just... let go. Yeah, they saw, in that last nanosecond, they saw... what they were. You, yourself, this whole big drama, it was never more than a jerry-rig of presumption and dumb will, and you could just let go. To finally know that you didn't have to hold on so tight. To realize that all your life - you know, all your love, all your hate, all your memories, all your pain - it was all the same thing. It was all the same dream, a dream that you had inside a locked room, a dream about being a person.

但如果人生仅仅是一场梦,我们应该如何是好呢?我们可以利用这个意识去面对我们失去的,而不要对外界的世界变化抱有幻想:并不是我们搬到一个新的地方,遇见了新的人,换了新的总统,我们的生活就会有改观。

You see, we all got what I call a life trap - a gene deep certainty that things will be different... that you'll move to another city and meet the people that'll be the friends for the rest of your life... that you'll fall in love and be fulfilled... fucking fulfillment... and closure, whatever the fuck those two fuckin' empty jars to hold this shit storm. Nothing's ever fulfilled, not until the very end. And closure - nothing is ever over.

Rust对宗教也十分嗤之以鼻。其实宗教是我们“害怕失去”的潜意识的自然发展结果,也是对“失去”的自我心理安慰。虽然事实告诉我们,每个人都会死,而且人命其实一钱不值。但是由于我们的大脑被我们的潜意识奴役,所以我们找了很多理由来证明我们的价值:我们的灵魂是永恒的,我们都是上帝的儿女,而且上帝如此爱我们,他牺牲了自己唯一的儿子来救我们的罪。这样我们每个人的生命就有了永恒的价值,而且更妙的是,我们还不怕失去这个生命。为什么呢?因为只要我们相信上帝,我们就能有永恒的生命。所以宗教似乎很完美地解决了我们生命无价值和害怕失去生命的问题。但是却让我们失去了更多的思想和人生自由。

Transference of fear and self-loathing to an authoritarian vessel. It's catharsis. He absorbs their dread with his narrative. Because of this, he's effective at proportion to the amount of certainty he can project. Certain linguistic anthropologists think that religion is a language virus that rewrites pathways in the brain. Dulls critical thinking.

我们可以用自我欺骗的方法去实现我们的目标,但是我们得非常清醒地知道自己是在自我欺骗。其实这已经不是信念,而是决心。只要有决心,什么困难我们都不怕,就连上帝都甚至会帮你。但是我们不可以不能不知道我们在自我欺骗,这样的话人生就完全失控了。

没人能够拯救我们,只有我们自己。如果这个世界没有希望,我们就是真正的希望。

Once there was only dark. If you ask me, the light's winning.

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