第152页 Los Alamos from Below

这一段看哭。
(I had obviously done something to myself pyschologically: Reality was so important - I had to understand what really happened to Arlene, physiologically - that i didn't cry unitl a number of months later, when i was in Oak Ridge. I was walking past a department store with dresses in the window, and i thought Arlene would like one of them. That was too much for me.)